Why I quit 3 times in the last year and a half and what I learned

I’ve been doing different kinds of sports ever since I was 5. And when I was little I had my own cherished understanding and respect for loyalty.

For some reason I really hated people who often switched from one sport to another rather than sticking to something.

Hard to tell, where I got this notion from. Probably one of my first coaches told me that you can only achieve success in sport(and life) through dedication.  And I took it as an absolute truth.

For a while, that was the way I felt about commitment and loyalty. Yet, every so often I had to go on and do a different sport. Because my family moved, because swimming fitted me better than acrobatics, because I didn’t like the thing I did before anymore.

Yet, I kept on thinking that loyalty and commitment are extremely important and those who switch sports often and leave my team or group are traitors. But at some point I started to develop critical thinking and understood that I myself wasn’t really an example of loyalty.

First I did acrobatics, then volleyball, then swimming, then high jump.

So I understood that life just happens. You do one thing, then you do something else. And most things don’t last forever.

And that’s okay. I’m happy I didn’t stay in acrobatics for my entire life. I was really bad — I once got a silver medal in a competition where there were just two participants.  So yeah. Switching lanes is okay.

But when I was starting to work, deep in me I still had the same excessive passion for loyalty.

I was thinking that if you stay in a company long enough, they will inevitably start valuing you and you’ll become one of them, and you’ll be really good and you’ll be forever happy.

And there are cases when that’s true. It is possible that you found the perfect company, team and work on first try.

But for most, it isn’t like this. And you owe it to yourself to understand it and to find the courage to move on.

In the last year and a half I changed 4 good companies. Neither of them fired me. I  quit all of those jobs.  And each time it was really emotional and hard. I’m not proud of it and I know that it might look bad on the CV. But if something isn’t right, you got to do everything in your power to feel peace.

So why did I quit those jobs?

Short answer: I didn’t like it there.

Something was always off – attitude of the colleagues, the boss, the salary, the little things.  But one of those things always led to another and what looked like a great opportunity during an interview became a very stressful experience couple of months in.

And in each company there are always employees who have been there for years and those who just love it there.

Good for them.

But you don’t have to adjust and try to fit in just because someone else likes the place you’re uncomfortable in.

Even though I always left having a new offer, leaving was scary every time. Telling your boss you’re leaving is incredibly scary. Waiting for the first day in the new company is scary. Losing everything is scary. Finding out that the new place is worse than the previous is scary. But you got to take the risk if you feel that you’re in the wrong place.

Anyway, here are some of the conclusions I’ve made after working for those 4 companies in a year and a half time span:

  • You need to talk to your superior if you don’t like something. They can’t and won’t read your mind to see how you feel. I wasn’t talking to any of my bosses honestly before. I just bitched about problems with my colleagues and when unhappiness pilled up, I quit. I didn’t talk to my bosses because I was scared they would get angry, I’d lose their graces and get fired. But the result is the same if I don’t talk and quit the job. So why not try talking?
  • You need to quit when the company isn’t giving you anything new. You can get everything from a company in a month, a year, 10 years. But when there’s no way for you to grow in terms of expertise and salary – there’s no point in staying. Unless you’re the CEO, CTO, CMO or other C-suite, when you reached the ceiling in the company, start looking for new opportunities.
  • Don’t feel like you have to tell anyone in the company that you’re looking for a new job. Unless you have real meaningful relations with someone there. Other than that, you don’t have to tell them anything. Considering other options and being open to opportunities is okay.
  • It’s okay to quit when a great opportunity arises. Your boss would do the same, probably did in the past and is likely to do it again in the future.
  • No one can disrespect you and belittle you. No matter who they are in the organization. If the company put a bad person in charge – screw them. Your professional dignity is crucial. If they don’t respect you – they won’t pay you adequately or help you grow. But most importantly – no one can humiliate you.
  • Bosses make mistakes too.  It’s okay to double-check what they say and make sure they didn’t mess up.
  • Wanting a raise isn’t a crime. If you see that your price on the market is higher – make it clear to the management. If they can’t help you – consider other options.
  • Taking sick days is okay. Even more so, it’s obligatory. If you’re sick – you have no right to come and contaminate the whole office.
  • Make sure to use your vacation days every year. Even if you don’t have any big plans.
  • A company needs you just as much, if not more than you need it. You don’t owe a company anything that isn’t specified in the contract.  A company won’t stay loyal to you if you’re not essential. People are viewed as resources by companies. Employees should view companies as tools for achieving goals.
  • Read contracts very carefully. Some companies put really messed up obligations in them.
  • Don’t give too many chances. If a company failed you twice, chances are, it will happen again. Don’t believe in last times.
  • No matter how unhappy I was when quitting, I never messed up my relations with anyone in the companies I was leaving. Some people might still be upset that I left. But I know that I did what I had to do and I didn’t lose face doing so. You will need a professional network later on in your life, so don’t trade it for being emotionally honest in an exit interview.
  • Extra hours cost extra.
  • It takes about half a year to get comfortable in a company. So when you decide to switch jobs, keep in mind that the next 6 months or so might be a little stressful.
  • If you’ve decided to leave, and have an offer pending, don’t take counter offers and just leave. If you stay and everyone knows you’ll leave if you’re given $100 more, that’s not good for your image.
  • Always keep your CV and LinkedIn account up to date and clean.

I’m not saying that I stick to all these rules now.  But I really try since I know they make employee’s life better.

I know switching jobs is scary. And it’s not always the right solution. Sometimes you need to solve problems and stay put. But there’s also nothing criminal in looking for new opportunities and taking the ones you think are good for you.